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"God is Love" vs. "Love is Love" (Romans 1:21-27) | Louis Azuma
01:18 Understanding God's Design for Marriage and Gender
02:48 Foundations of Love and Identity
11:32 Defending the Goodness of God's Design
20:05 Addressing the Sinfulness of LGBTQ+ Thinking
26:18 Redefining Goodness and Love
35:49 Common Questions and Answers
46:06 The Gospel for All Sinners
48:45 Conclusion and Prayer
Transcript
Alright, well, well, tonight, um, so we've been going
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:through the book of Romans, right?
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:Romans and Romans chapter one talks
about a really, really important.
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:Issue something really important
that, so important that I thought
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:it would be best if we just took
a night to talk about this topic.
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:So tonight we are going to talk
about homosexuality and LGBTQ
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:plus all of that because in Romans
one, verses 26 and 27 talked about
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:how the, some people who had, um.
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:What's called, what they said were
unnatural desires, desires for, uh, men,
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:desiring men and women desiring women.
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:And so that's what we're gonna talk about.
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:We're gonna talk about all of that.
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:And so, um, it's gonna be, uh,
hopefully really helpful for you to
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:see what God says, why he says it,
um, why certain things that the, the
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:Bible says about what we would call
sin and how to talk to people about.
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:This topic, because I'm sure this
is not your favorite thing to
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:talk about with people at school.
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:So, um, that's what
we're gonna talk about.
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:So this is what we're gonna do.
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:We're gonna be looking at what the
Bible says about LGBTQ plus ideas and
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:thoughts and desires and all that.
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:Okay?
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:So what I want for you tonight,
this is my goal for you, is I want
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:you to be clear and confident.
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:About God's design, God's design for
marriage, God's design for gender, God's
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:design for attraction, God's design
for romance, for all those things.
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:I want you to be clear.
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:This is what God says.
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:This is how God made people to live
and to interact with each other.
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:I want you to have clarity about that.
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:I want that to make sense.
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:I want you to understand what God
says, and I want you to be confident.
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:I want you to be like,
that's a good thing.
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:I'm so glad God says what he says.
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:I'm so glad God made people
the way he made people.
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:I want you to be clear about it.
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:I want you to understand it,
and I want you to be confident.
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:I want you to feel really good about it.
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:I want you to, to affirm it, and I want
you to not be embarrassed about it.
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:Especially in today's culture, it's,
it's easy for someone to make you
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:feel embarrassed about what God says.
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:I'm gonna make you feel like a
bad person for believing what the
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:Bible says about these things.
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:So I want you to be confident.
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:I don't want you to be embarrassed.
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:I don't want you to be ashamed,
and I don't want you to, to feel
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:like this is a bad thing, that
God says these things, okay?
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:That's what I want for you.
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:So here's our starting point, okay?
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:Our, our number one starting
point when we're thinking
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:about all of this stuff, right?
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:When you think about, um.
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:All the different, all the different
aspects of, of gender and sexuality
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:and identity and all of these things.
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:The number one thing I want you
to start with is that God is love.
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:That's where I want you to start.
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:God loves you more than you love yourself.
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:God loves you more than you love yourself.
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:That's not our first point, but that
is where I want you to start, that God
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:loves you more than you love yourself.
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:In fact, God loves people so much
that one John four says that he
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:sent his son to die for people.
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:He God took on flesh and died for people.
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:That's how much God loves you.
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:He was willing to do that for you.
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:God loves you more than you love you,
and so because of that, God wants
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:what's best for you, more than you want.
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:What's best for you, right?
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:God wants you to be happy more
than you want you to be happy.
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:Maybe you've never thought about that
before, but this is our, our starting
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:place because a lot of people will
tell you, well, it's unloving for
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:God to say these things about me.
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:It's unloving for you to tell me
X, y, and Z about my gender or
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:who I'm allowed to marry or what
I'm allowed to say about myself.
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:So our starting point is
that, that God loves you.
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:God loves people so much.
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:So that, that's our starting point,
and we even see that here, right?
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:In one John four, beloved
let us love one another.
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:For love is from God.
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:So love is God's idea, right?
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:In our title.
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:There's that, that phrase that
you hear thrown out a lot.
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:That love is love, right?
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:Don't let anyone tell
you who you can love.
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:Well, actually, love is God's idea.
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:God invented love.
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:Love actually existed before
the world existed because God,
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:the Father loved God the son.
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:Before he made anyone so love
actually has existed before the
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:world existed before Adam and Eve
were created before Sin entered
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:the world, God made us out of love.
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:Actually.
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:God made people so he could love them.
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:So love is God's idea.
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:Whoever loves has been
born of God and knows God.
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:So the only way you can love truly is
if you have a relationship with God.
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:You see that the only way that you can
actually love someone has to do with God.
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:You cannot love apart from God.
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:It's, it's really not love.
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:It's just a fake imitation of love.
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:Whoever loves has been
born of God and knows God.
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:Anyone who does not.
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:Love does not know God
because God is love.
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:Now, these three words are three
of the, this is one of the most
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:important phrases in the Bible.
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:God is love.
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:It's not saying that God is loving,
it's saying that God is love.
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:What's the difference there?
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:Well, the difference is that, God,
this is, this is a definition, right?
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:Who God is is love.
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:So whatever love is has to be.
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:Consistent with who God is.
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:You can't make love something that's
not consistent with who God is.
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:I heard one theologian put it
this way, he said that, that Jesus
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:is love covered over in flesh.
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:Jesus is love in a human
body because God is love.
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:So the way we define love is by God.
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:So.
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:Well, how?
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:What does it look like to love someone?
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:Well, what's God like?
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:That's where we start.
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:We start with God.
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:That's how we learn what love is.
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:You can't learn what love
is unless you know God.
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:So that has to be our starting point.
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:God is loving God.
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:In fact is love.
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:God invented love.
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:Love is God's idea.
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:So that's the first thing I
want you to start with it.
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:That love has to be.
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:From God has to be in relationship to God.
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:The second thing I want you to start
with is that your identity, who you are
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:is defined by God, not your body, not
your emotions, and not your experiences.
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:Who you are is not dependent
on your physical body.
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:If that, which that has to be true.
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:Because if, if you believe in life
after death, well your body's dead,
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:but you're still alive, right?
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:So who you are has to be more than
just what your body says, right?
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:Your emotions don't define who you are,
how you feel doesn't define who you are
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:and what you go through in life, right?
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:The things that happen to you.
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:Don't define who you are.
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:God determines who you are.
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:God made you right?
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:God made people.
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:People are God's idea, right?
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:No one thought of people until God did.
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:God made people.
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:People like a human being is God's idea.
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:So you can't just be like, well, I know
you made humans God, but actually this
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:is what I think humans should be like.
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:'cause it doesn't make any sense, right?
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:That's like telling the person who.
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:Made a piano to be like, well, actually
I think a piano should have symbols and
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:should have a, you know, have, like,
you should actually play it with a bow.
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:Or you should actually, it should,
you know, I, I think a piano
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:should actually be, um, I think
it should actually have a screen.
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:Like, and, and like, that's
not a, that's not a piano.
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:Right.
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:You, you've changed it into something.
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:It's not because whoever
came up with the piano.
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:What they made, they made this
thing, and if you change it, it's
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:not what it is anymore, right?
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:Your identity is defined by
God, not your, your body, your
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:emotions or your experiences.
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:So, so people are, are God's creation.
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:People are God's idea.
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:And so God gets to tell us who
we are and God gets to tell
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:us how we're supposed to live.
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:But that's why this is
so important too, right?
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:Because it's a loving God who's
telling us all these things.
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:It's a loving God who made us.
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:It's, it's a God who, who wants
your joy, who made you, and who
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:made you to, to be a very specific.
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:Person and to live a very specific way.
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:It's not just like he God's like,
oh well you know, you better do what
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:I say just 'cause I told you to.
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:Right?
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:Like when you were a kid, the
worst answer from your parent
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:was always, 'cause I said so,
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:which is true 'cause there's authority
there, but also it's because I love you.
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:Whenever God tells you to do something,
it's not just 'cause I said so.
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:It's because I love.
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:I want what's best for you, and I
have something good for you in mind
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:that's supposed to come from all this.
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:So God loves you and God
gets to tell you who you are.
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:Those are the two foundations.
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:Now there's gonna be three things,
three terms that you might run into,
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:you may have already encountered them,
that I just wanna briefly define for
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:you to get us all on the same page.
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:Okay?
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:There's three things that I think
you need to know when we talk about
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:homosexuality and L-G-B-T-Q and
transgender and all this stuff.
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:Okay?
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:This sounds like health class.
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:I don't like health class, so let's
pretend it's not health class.
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:Okay.
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:Orientation.
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:Your orientation is who or what
you're attracted to, right?
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:So, um, that includes romantic
and emotional attraction,
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:not just physical attraction.
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:So if you hear about someone's like,
oh, they're their orientation, right?
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:That's who or what you're attracted to.
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:We good?
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:All right, sweet.
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:Your gender identity is a subjective.
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:Subjective.
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:What does subjective mean?
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:Objective.
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:Right?
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:Subjective.
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:That means it's biased.
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:That means it's not necessarily
true, it's just how I feel.
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:Gender identity, our subjective
understanding of ourselves as male,
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:female, both new, et cetera, right?
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:Whatever.
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:It's, you can be wrong essentially.
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:That's what subjective means, right?
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:It's an opinion.
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:So it identity, your gender identity
is your pers your idea, your own
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:understanding of, of who you are.
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:And then your expression is how you
present that identity to other people.
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:By the clothes you wear, the, the
way your voice sounds, the way
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:you look, that's how you express
your perceived identity, right?
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:So for example, right?
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:I perceive myself to be male,
so I present myself as a male.
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:I wear boy clothes, I try to
look like a boy, et cetera.
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:Now, those are just some terms that.
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:We all need to be on the same page.
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:Gonna be using them.
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:Okay, so the first thing I want
you to see is that, like we talked
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:about, God's design is a good thing.
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:God made us the way.
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:He made us for good, for for a
good purpose because he loves us.
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:And the way the Bible talks about
humans and how humans are supposed
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:to live and interact, the way God
made humans is a really good thing.
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:So for our first point tonight.
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:I want you to defend the
goodness of God's design.
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:Defend the goodness of God's design.
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:Turn to Mark chapter 10 in your Bibles.
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:Defend the goodness of God's Designs,
our first point, and when you're writing
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:that down, turn to Mark, chapter 10.
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:Mark chapter 10.
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:So remember, I want you
to be confident, right?
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:That the way God made people and the
way God made relationships, the way
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:God made marriage is a good thing.
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:And I want you to be confident
enough where you can defend it.
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:I want you to be clear about it so you
know what God says, and I want you to
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:be confident you're not embarrassed,
that when someone disagrees, that you're
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:not like, oh, sorry about that, my bad.
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:I want you to be able to defend.
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:So Mark 10 is where we're going.
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:We're gonna be listening
at verses six through nine.
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:Now, if you're in a conversation with
someone about what God says about
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:marriage, this is a great place to
go because one, it's Jesus talking.
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:And a lot of people, even if they don't
necessarily believe the Bible, they'll
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:at least respect something Jesus said.
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:And two, Jesus quotes Genesis, which
is a big deal because he's tying
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:what he says into God's creation.
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:He's tying what he says about
marriage to God's creation.
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:He's affirming what God
did in Genesis one and two.
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:So Mark chapter 10
verses six through nine.
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:Okay, so some, we're gonna make
some quick observations here about
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:this chapter about God's design.
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:Okay?
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:So, but from the beginning of creation.
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:God made them male and female.
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:So see the quotes, that's
a quote from Genesis.
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:I think that's Genesis 2
24, if I remember correctly.
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:So there's a couple observations
here right off the bat, from the
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:beginning of creation, this was
always God's intended design.
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:God always had an intended set design
for how humans are supposed to be.
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:Here's how he made them.
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:God made them male and
female, right, and again.
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:Your parents probably never would've
thought this was a controversial
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:statement, but today in 2025, this is
a controversial statement, God made
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:people to either be male or be female.
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:That is a controversial
statement today, right?
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:So
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:the implication here, what Jesus is
saying there, the Pharisees are asking
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:about marriage, is that this is God's
design from the beginning of time.
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:When God created people, he
designed them with gender.
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:He designed them with marriage in mind.
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:And after this, you'll see he
designed them with attraction,
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:with a right orientation.
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:So God designed people to have a, a,
a correct gender identity, to have a
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:correct gender expression of that identity
and to have a correct orientation.
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:That's God's idea, right?
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:That's not just someone's
opinion or someone's subjective.
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:Understanding of how they feel.
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:Right?
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:God has a design for your orientation,
for what you're attracted to.
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:God has a design for your identity,
what gender you are, and God has a
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:design for how you express that gender.
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:So the first thing God designed,
love, marriage and attraction
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:as a gift to point back to him.
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:And we can see more of
that in Ephesians five.
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:We're not gonna go there, but
what Ephesians five says is
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:that marriage is about Jesus.
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:Marriage is about God.
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:So.
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:That's the first thing.
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:God design.
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:It's God's idea.
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:Love is God's idea.
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:Marriage is God's idea.
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:Attraction is God's idea.
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:Gender is God's idea.
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:He made all of these
things, so he owns them.
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:They're his idea as a
gift to point back to him.
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:That's the first thing I want you to see.
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:Now, second thing that I want you to see
here, which we already talked about, God
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:made them male and female, and now notice.
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:The, the very specific language
he uses in this passage.
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:Therefore, a man shall
leave his father and mother.
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:He doesn't say parents.
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:He says, father and mother, and
a man shall leave his father and
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:mother and hold fast to his wife,
and the two shall become one flesh.
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:So what Jesus is saying very
clearly is not in marriage.
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:Marriage is between a man and a woman.
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:It's very clear this is what God's
design is from the beginning of creation.
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:God designed.
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:People to be male or female
and to stay that way.
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:And he designed marriage to be
between one man and one woman.
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:That's what, that's what
God says about marriage.
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:Now, that's probably not news to you.
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:I hope that's not news to you, but I want
you to be absolutely clear about that.
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:That is God's design for marriage.
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:One man, one woman.
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:So he also expects people to
express themselves that way.
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:Not just to say, oh yeah, I'm
a man, but to consistently
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:express themselves as that.
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:So the second thing about God's design
that I want you to see here is that God
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:created people to express themselves as
male or female from conception, right?
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:Not to confuse people about their
gender or not to pretend that
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:they are something they're not.
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:That's how God designed people to live.
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:God designed people to express themselves.
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:As their designed gender and to
not confuse people with how they
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:present that gender to others.
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:And you can see that in the Old
Testament law when, when God makes the
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:Old Testament law, he tell he cares
about the clothes that people wear.
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:He says, if you're a guy,
don't dress like a girl.
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:And he says, you shouldn't have
relationships that are outside
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:of this design for marriage.
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:So that's the second thing I want
you to see about God's design.
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:So God designed love and
marriage and attraction.
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:It's his idea.
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:He created people to express
themselves as male or female from
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:the time that they were born, right?
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:From the time that they exist.
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:It could actually in conception.
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:What else?
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:Well, we already covered this.
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:He, you see there's, there's one
man and there's one woman, right?
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:There's, there's only two, right?
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:There's, there's, God did not design
there to be more than two people
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:in a romantic relationship, right?
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:So maybe you've heard.
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:Someone at school who says
something about a throuple
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:that's not part of God's design.
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:God designed romantic relationships
between one person and one
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:person, one male and one female.
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:So again, God designed marriage
between one man, one woman, right?
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:Two people, which again, hopefully
this is not news to you, but this
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:is very clear about what God says.
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:So this probably isn't new to you, and
this probably isn't shocking to you.
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:Hopefully.
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:But this has to be our starting place.
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:What does God say?
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:Right?
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:Because we have to start with
what does God say about this?
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:And then when, when we see an idea
right in the culture that's presented
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:to us that well, you know, why can't
one man and one man get married?
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:Or why can't a woman try to
express herself as a man?
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:Or why can't a woman be oriented towards
another woman in her attractions?
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:Then we say, well, what does God say?
380
:This is what God's design for
marriage is, and his design for
381
:attraction follows suit, right?
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:So I want you to be able to
clearly defend what God's design
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:for marriage, for marriage is.
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:Okay?
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:I want you to be able to be able to
articulate these things, to explain
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:these things to someone, okay?
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:But when you encounter an idea right
at school, when, when your teacher
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:or the book you're reading, or
you're a friend or your teammate.
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:Or that person you see on
social media presents an idea
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:that is against God's design.
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:I want you to be able
to see why it's wrong.
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:Okay, so that's our second point.
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:Address the sinfulness
of lgbtq plus thinking.
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:Address the sinfulness of it.
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:It's not just incorrect,
it's sinful, right?
396
:It's not just misguided, it's sinful.
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:And this comes back to what
we define sin as, right?
398
:What makes something sinful.
399
:Now hopefully you know how to get here.
400
:We're gonna go to Romans chapter one.
401
:Okay.
402
:Romans chapter one, and this is
where it's gonna be really helpful to
403
:remember the stuff that we've talked
about for the past couple weeks.
404
:Okay.
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:Romans chapter one is where.
406
:Uh, we're gonna look.
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:Okay.
408
:Romans chapter one.
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:So what makes something sinful?
410
:What makes something sinful?
411
:We talked about this
the past couple weeks.
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:What makes something sinful?
413
:Well, what makes something sinful
is what it says about God, right?
414
:That's what we learned from Romans one.
415
:What makes something sinful
is what it says about God.
416
:Romans one talks about how people
exchange God's glory for created things.
417
:Romans one talks about how people
exchange the truth about God for a lie.
418
:What makes something sinful
is what it says about God.
419
:So the first reason that we're gonna
see that LGBTQ plus thinking is
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:sinful is because it's a rejection
of God and his good design.
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:It's a rejection of God
and his good design.
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:That's what the Bible says.
423
:So look with me at the first.
424
:We're gonna look at Romans 1 21 to 23.
425
:Okay?
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:Romans 1, 21 to 23.
427
:So like we talked about,
we see these people, right?
428
:Romans one is talking about, about
people, and it says they knew God.
429
:They didn't honor God.
430
:They didn't honor him as God.
431
:They didn't thank him, but
instead they, so they knew about
432
:him, but they rejected him.
433
:And so they started to,
to think a different way.
434
:They started to.
435
:To think, well, God's not worth
honoring, God's not worth glorifying,
436
:God's not worth living for.
437
:And they thought they were really smart
about it, but instead they became foolish.
438
:'cause they, like we said,
they fell for the trap.
439
:Right?
440
:They fell for the trap of
sin is better than God.
441
:So they're foolish.
442
:They, they made a bad trade, right?
443
:They, they made a bad trade.
444
:They fell for it and they, they traded
God and all the joy that he gives them.
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:And they said, we want this.
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:Worst thing instead.
447
:And that's foolish, right?
448
:That's, that's dumb to do that to,
to give up God for sin as foolish.
449
:You're making a bad trade.
450
:So what do they do?
451
:Why was that foolish?
452
:They exchanged the glory of the
immoral God for images resembling.
453
:All of these created things
that aren't as good as God.
454
:That's what these three verses are saying.
455
:So we know where this is gonna go, right?
456
:We know that the next word is therefore,
and then it starts talking about
457
:this spiral, and that's where we.
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:Ran into the topic of homosexuality.
459
:So the, the core issue with L-G-B-T-Q
thinking or desires is not that it's bad.
460
:The core issue is not that, well, it used
to be wrong in the:
461
:The core issue is not that the
Republican party votes against it.
462
:That's not the, that's
not what's wrong with it.
463
:What's wrong with it is
it's a rejection of God.
464
:Because what you're doing, if you, if
you follow these sinful desires, you're
465
:saying, God, I know you made me this way.
466
:I know you made me to be a
man, and I don't want that.
467
:That's not good for me.
468
:I know better.
469
:You see that?
470
:See how it's, it's saying,
God, I'm smarter than you.
471
:God, I know better than you.
472
:God, I can make me happier than you can.
473
:That's what you're saying to God.
474
:What all sin is,
475
:but especially this sin, these type
of desires and thinking, it's saying,
476
:God, I know you made me this way.
477
:I know you made people to work this way.
478
:I know you made marriage to be this
way, but I think this way is better.
479
:It's a rejection of God.
480
:It's an it's lack of trust in God.
481
:It's saying, God, I don't
trust you to make me happy.
482
:I'm gonna go my own way
because my way is better.
483
:It's rebellion against God, it's rejection
of God just like every other sin.
484
:You understand that, right?
485
:This is not really that different.
486
:Your, your friends at school or
your classmates who believe these
487
:things, it's really just a more
obvious rebellion against God, right?
488
:It's, it's the same root cause
as your sin and as my sin.
489
:And that's what's so cool
about Romans one, right?
490
:Is it, it puts all of
us in the same bucket.
491
:We all reject God.
492
:All sin is a rejection of God.
493
:All sin is a rebellion against God and
saying, God, you're not good enough.
494
:I want something else.
495
:And that's the core issue.
496
:So if you have a friend, right, who, who
says that, that they're gay, this, this
497
:is their biggest problem, they reject God.
498
:Their biggest problem is not
who they're attracted to.
499
:Their biggest problem is not
that they think they're a girl
500
:when they're actually a boy.
501
:That's not their biggest problem.
502
:Their biggest problem is
they don't love Jesus.
503
:They think Jesus is boring,
lame, unhelpful, useless,
504
:not glorious.
505
:Right.
506
:Not worth their time, not worth
following, not worth living for.
507
:That's their biggest problem.
508
:And that's everyone's
biggest problem, right?
509
:That's my biggest problem.
510
:That's your biggest
problem, is we, we think.
511
:We think God is lame.
512
:We go worship other things and
ask other things to make us happy.
513
:So that's the biggest problem.
514
:So if you're ever talking about
this someone, or thinking through
515
:issues like this, remember that
that's the biggest problem.
516
:That's what's, what makes it
sinful, is what it says about God.
517
:So the second thing.
518
:That makes this sinful.
519
:Is it redefines goodness and love, right?
520
:We saw that in one John that God is
love, but, but with these people who
521
:believe these things or, or maybe some
of your classmates or maybe even some
522
:of you who, who believe these things
say, well actually this is what's good.
523
:This is what's love.
524
:I know God said this is good.
525
:I know God said this is how
love works, but actually I
526
:think this is how it should go,
527
:and we see that.
528
:And we keep going in our
passage in Romans verse 24.
529
:Now, therefore, God gave them up in the
lust of their hearts to impurity, to
530
:dishonoring their bodies among themselves.
531
:He's talking about, oh, immorality
here, because they exchange
532
:the truth about God for a lie.
533
:You see that they redefine something.
534
:They say, I know this is true, but
actually I'm gonna believe this Instead.
535
:There's a, there's an exchange there
of, well, I, God said this is loving,
536
:but actually I think this is loving.
537
:I know God said this is good, but
actually I think this is good and it's
538
:the same root cause for all of us, right?
539
:All of our sin starts that way too.
540
:Proverbs talks about there's, it
says, there's a proverb that says
541
:there's a way that seems right to a
man, but at its end it leads to death.
542
:That's all of us.
543
:Right?
544
:Last week we talked about the
illustration of the wolf licking
545
:the knife until it dies and chokes
on its own blood and bleeds out
546
:'cause it thinks it's eating food.
547
:It, it thinks it's living
and it's really dying.
548
:That's the same sinful thinking
that our sin is caused by, and
549
:that this sin is caused by.
550
:It's, I think this is good
for me, and it's really not.
551
:It's really gonna kill you.
552
:So that's the second
reason that it's sinful.
553
:The third reason is it
redefines our identity by our
554
:feelings and not by God's word.
555
:It says, I am who I am because of how I
feel, not because of who God says I am.
556
:I heard one person this
week, this is really helpful.
557
:They said that, um, LGBTQ plus, right?
558
:Whether you say you're bisexual or you
say you're asexual or queer or whatever,
559
:that doesn't describe who you are.
560
:It describes how you feel.
561
:You see the difference there.
562
:It's not who you are.
563
:That's how you feel.
564
:That's not your identity.
565
:That's how you feel.
566
:Just like.
567
:Any other sin, right?
568
:Just because you feel that way
doesn't mean that's who you are.
569
:So
570
:it redefines our identity by our
feelings and not by God's word.
571
:And that's what we see here, right?
572
:I see.
573
:See this word passions here,
passion, passions, that's
574
:desires, that's things you want.
575
:So these people, they say, well, this is
what I want, so this must be who I am.
576
:You see how that that logic goes, this
is how I feel, so this must be who I am.
577
:This is what I want, so
this must be how I am.
578
:Now, what we don't realize
is that we're all sinful.
579
:We all want bad things, and
so we all want bad things.
580
:And so we, if we define ourselves
by those bad desires, then obviously
581
:we're gonna follow a really bad path.
582
:So we can't define
ourselves by our feelings.
583
:We have to define
ourselves by what God says.
584
:And now the last thing.
585
:Is that these desires
are inherently sinful.
586
:The desire itself is sinful,
587
:so to be attracted to someone of
the same biological sex is sinful.
588
:That desire is a bad desire, and so there
is no God glorifying way to express.
589
:That's the fourth thing that's
that's wrong with this is there's
590
:no God glorifying way to express
a desire that's inherently sinful.
591
:Just like if someone had a
desire to murder someone,
592
:there's no good way to do that.
593
:You could say the same thing about if
someone had a desire to cheat on their
594
:wife, there's no good way to do that.
595
:There's no God-honoring
way to express that desire.
596
:Same thing with these type of desires.
597
:If, if you, if someone has that desire to
a, maybe it's just a romantic attraction.
598
:Maybe it's not physical attraction,
maybe it's just romantic attraction.
599
:For, for if you're a girl, you have a
romantic attraction to another girl,
600
:that's a sinful desire and there's
no God honoring way to express that.
601
:You can't feel that for the goalie of God.
602
:That's not something, that's
not something you can feel and,
603
:and honor God while doing so.
604
:The desire itself is a sinful desire.
605
:Why?
606
:Well, because all these things, it,
it goes against God's design, right?
607
:It's saying, God, I know you made me
to be oriented this way, but actually
608
:I'm gonna be oriented this way.
609
:You're saying, God, the, the
orientation that you say in
610
:your word is actually not good.
611
:That's why it's a sinful desire.
612
:It redefines goodness.
613
:It says, well, I, I know you
define this to be good for me,
614
:this orientation or this identity.
615
:I actually don't want that.
616
:I want this identity or
this orientation instead.
617
:So it's a rejection of God.
618
:It's redefining what love is and it's
saying, it's, it's, again, these two
619
:things kind of bleed into this, right?
620
:So that's what's wrong with it, right?
621
:That's what's sinful about these desires.
622
:That's what's sinful about, um, redefining
what love for someone looks like.
623
:Because you can't love someone in a sinful
way because again, love is from God.
624
:Love is God's idea.
625
:God can't love you in a sinful way.
626
:Love can't be like real love
can't be expressed in a sinful way
627
:because it's, it's God's thing.
628
:So it's really not love if it's sinful.
629
:So if two people are loving each
other in a sinful way, they're not
630
:really loving each other, right?
631
:They are actually being
bad for each other.
632
:Which then isn't loving.
633
:'cause if I'm being bad for
you, I'm not loving you.
634
:If, if I'm being bad for
you, that's not love.
635
:I should stop love.
636
:I should stop loving you in that way and
actually love you by being good for you.
637
:So
638
:I want you to be clear about
what God says right in his word.
639
:And I want you to be confident
that it's a good thing.
640
:That it's actually this being,
like feeling this way is
641
:actually really bad for someone.
642
:Just like being anxious is
really bad for someone, right?
643
:It, it, it stinks.
644
:It's not good for you
645
:or having impure thoughts
isn't good for you.
646
:In the same way these kind of desires
and this I try to identify yourself by
647
:these type of ideas is not good for you.
648
:It's, it's sinful.
649
:Um, and so I want you to, to love
people enough to be clear about that
650
:and to not be embarrassed, right?
651
:You wouldn't be embarrassed.
652
:So people a lot of times worry about
my health because I love Mountain Dew.
653
:I love Mountain Dew.
654
:I think Mountain Dew is like
the greatest thing ever.
655
:And so a lot of people will tell
me, Hey, you shouldn't drink that.
656
:You know, that's banned in Europe.
657
:Like, you shouldn't do that, right?
658
:You shouldn't drink that.
659
:There's no way that's good for
you because they love me, right?
660
:They season, they see me
drinking something bad for me and
661
:they're like, Hey, I love you.
662
:So don't do that.
663
:Right?
664
:I hope, I hope that, that if,
if you have maybe friends.
665
:Who believe these things are good for
them, that you're loving enough to
666
:be able to tell them, you know what,
that's really not gonna make you happy.
667
:That's really not good for you.
668
:'cause if you really love someone,
you are going to be clear about that
669
:and you're gonna be confident that you
know what, this really is good for you.
670
:So I wanna tell you what is good for you.
671
:That's following God's design, right?
672
:Having an orientation that God gave you.
673
:Rather than the orientation that you
feel or having the, or embracing the,
674
:the gender that God made you as not the
one that you feel like you should be.
675
:That's what's best for someone.
676
:So this last few minutes here,
I want to prepare you for
677
:loving and wise conversations.
678
:Okay.
679
:I want to give you just, we're
gonna walk through some, like a few
680
:common questions that people have.
681
:About this that you might have about this.
682
:Um, and hopefully this will help
you engage in conversations.
683
:Now remember, these conversations need
to be loving and they need to be wise.
684
:So if you're just gonna walk
around telling people that
685
:they're terrible people, that's
not loving and that's not wise.
686
:If you're just gonna argue
with people that's not loving
687
:and that's not wise, right?
688
:We want to.
689
:Be loving about this.
690
:We want to actually care about the people.
691
:We don't just wanna be right.
692
:We want to be thoughtful and and
compassionate with how we talk about
693
:what God says, because Christians have
a very bad reputation for how they talk
694
:about this topic, because a lot of times
Christians don't do this very well.
695
:So I want you, I want you to
help you do this well, but I
696
:also want you to be clear, right?
697
:And sometimes when you're clear,
people are gonna take that
698
:as unloving, and that's okay.
699
:Right?
700
:They're.
701
:As you know, someone recently in part
got shot because of this believing stuff
702
:like this and saying stuff like this.
703
:And so some people will just not
want to hear it, and that's okay.
704
:But some common questions that you
might have or you might run into first
705
:one, isn't outta my control, right?
706
:It's not my fault.
707
:I, I'm, I'm the way that
I am, it's not my fault.
708
:How can God tell me to be someone I'm not?
709
:How can God tell me to feel a certain way?
710
:How come this is the way I am?
711
:Well, the first thing I want you to think
about is that all sinful desires come to
712
:us naturally because we're all born and
sinners, all of our hearts are sinful.
713
:Jeremiah 17 says that your heart
is deceitful and desperately sick.
714
:James four says that your desires
are at war within you, and all your
715
:sins come from your bad desires.
716
:So every sinful desire comes from
our hearts because of who we are.
717
:We are sinful people.
718
:Our hearts are very bad.
719
:They are very sinful.
720
:They are inherently opposed to God,
opposed to to what God says, and we
721
:don't want to love God initially.
722
:So.
723
:In a sense, every sinful desire is
724
:natural to you because you're born in sin.
725
:You're born with a sinful heart, so
you are wired to want sinful things.
726
:So it shouldn't be surprising
when you, when someone who's not
727
:a Christian wants sinful things,
because that's how their heart is.
728
:Their heart is.
729
:Wired to want sin.
730
:Does that make sense?
731
:If it doesn't make sense, you
can shake your head and I can
732
:explain it a different way.
733
:That's okay.
734
:Right?
735
:But you're so, however, scripture is clear
that we are responsible for those sinful
736
:desires because we really want them.
737
:Because like you're responsible for,
for your anger because you really
738
:did hate that person in the moment.
739
:Like you really wanted that.
740
:You really wanted bad things to
happen to them and you really did
741
:hate them, and that's, that's sinful
because you actually wanted it.
742
:So yes.
743
:In a sense that, did you, did you
like intentionally think, you know
744
:what, I'm gonna be born in sin and I'm
gonna want sinful things and whatever.
745
:No, but you really did want
those things and so Yes.
746
:Maybe it's not something
that you asked for, right?
747
:Maybe someone's.
748
:Someone's attraction to the wrong,
the wrong gender that God didn't
749
:design them to be attracted to could
be something they didn't ask for.
750
:They didn't wake.
751
:Maybe they didn't wake up one
day and say, you know what?
752
:I'm gonna reject God's design and I'm
going to be attracted to the same gender.
753
:Maybe they didn't ask for that and decide
that, but if they really want it, then
754
:that's them having a sinful desire.
755
:Just like if, if you compare
it to impure thoughts, right?
756
:You don't necessarily say, you know what?
757
:I really want to have these impure
thoughts, but you really do want them, or
758
:coveting, or anxiety or whatever, right?
759
:You don't necessarily say, oh, I
really want these impure thoughts or
760
:these anxious thoughts, but you really
do feel them and they really are
761
:something that comes from your heart.
762
:So.
763
:We are responsible for those desires.
764
:We might not always know why we feel the
way we do, but we are responsible for
765
:our response to those desires, right?
766
:What you do with what you
feel is your responsibility.
767
:If you have a sinful feeling,
you're, you're accountable for
768
:what you do with that feeling.
769
:Do you feed it and embrace it,
or do you take it to the Lord
770
:and ask him to help you kill it?
771
:So that's the first thing, is
you're responsible for your.
772
:Response to your sinful desires.
773
:But then, right.
774
:You might have heard this one.
775
:What if my desires or my orientation
isn't hurting anyone else?
776
:Right?
777
:Maybe you heard this one.
778
:Why can't those two people just love each
other the way they want to and move on?
779
:Well, first of all, right,
what makes sin a sin?
780
:What it says about God?
781
:So does sin have to hurt
anyone else for it to be a sin?
782
:No.
783
:Right if, if you decide to, to go
be Hindu and live in a monastery
784
:for the rest of your life.
785
:By yourself?
786
:Are you hurting anyone?
787
:Not necessarily.
788
:Are you sinning?
789
:Yes, you're worshiping a false
God, you are rejecting God.
790
:So just because it doesn't hurt anyone
else, doesn't mean it's not sinful
791
:because it's a rejection of God.
792
:It's a rejection of his goodness,
his design and all that.
793
:Now, what about this one, right?
794
:This is probably the most
common one you've heard.
795
:What if two people really love each other?
796
:Why can't they be together?
797
:Two people.
798
:They really love each other.
799
:What if they're really nice to each other?
800
:They're really kind to each other.
801
:Maybe they're really good for
each other, all that stuff.
802
:Well, first of all, like we talk
about what is love right now you're
803
:all singing the song in your head.
804
:Do these people really love each other?
805
:If they're loving each
other in a sinful way?
806
:No, they don't.
807
:They don't really love each other
according to God's definition of love.
808
:They're affirming someone's sin, right?
809
:They're saying, oh yeah, you're sinning.
810
:That's great.
811
:Let's do that together.
812
:That's not loving, that's actually
hating someone because you're
813
:saying, you know that thing that's
gonna kill you and send you to hell.
814
:Let's keep doing that.
815
:That's not a good, that's
not a way to love someone.
816
:So just because two people really
like each other and want to be
817
:together doesn't mean they should.
818
:And, and you can say the same thing
about God's design for marriage, right?
819
:God designed two people
to stay married, right?
820
:To not get divorced.
821
:That was God's intended design.
822
:So that's why if, if you get married,
you can't just be like, oh, well I don't
823
:feel like loving this person anymore.
824
:I'm just gonna leave and
start loving someone else.
825
:Well, what if we really love each other?
826
:Well, that's a bad feeling.
827
:That's a sinful feeling, right?
828
:You wouldn't want your parents to
do that, or if your parents have,
829
:it's been really hard for you.
830
:That's why you just 'cause you
feel something doesn't mean
831
:it's a good feeling, right?
832
:You have to evaluate your
feelings by what God says.
833
:Now this one can be really fun.
834
:Can I be LGBTQ plus and
still be a Christian?
835
:So
836
:the question I would ask then is.
837
:Can you embrace your sinful
identity and embrace Jesus as
838
:your treasure and your Lord?
839
:No.
840
:Right?
841
:Just like there's no adulterous
Christians, there's no murdering
842
:Christians, there's no coveting Christian.
843
:You can't identify yourself by your
sin and say, oh yeah, I'm with Jesus.
844
:Right?
845
:You can't love your sin
and say, I follow God.
846
:Scripture is is clear, right?
847
:Like we talked about.
848
:God has a good design and any desires
outside of that design are sinful
849
:because they're bad for you, right?
850
:They'll kill you.
851
:They don't make you happy, and so
852
:you can't embrace Jesus and
embrace your sin, right?
853
:Jesus says you can't serve two masters.
854
:So that's, there's a very
clear answer to that.
855
:But what about this one?
856
:I'm a Christian, but I
struggle with these desires.
857
:Am I just always
displeasing God right now?
858
:Maybe you've heard that before.
859
:It's like, well, can this person
ever become a Christian if they
860
:just, this is just the way they are.
861
:They have these desires.
862
:Well, I would ask you the same question.
863
:When you became a Christian, did
all your sinful desires go away?
864
:No.
865
:So what does this mean then?
866
:Right?
867
:What does struggle mean?
868
:Right.
869
:Because a lot of times we say,
I'm struggling with something,
870
:and what does that mean?
871
:It means I'm getting beat up by it
and I'm just giving into my sin.
872
:That's not struggling.
873
:There's no struggling going on.
874
:You're getting, you're
getting beat up, right?
875
:It's kinda like, you know, in sports
when they say there's a rivalry game.
876
:It's really just like one team
always beating the other team.
877
:That's not a rivalry.
878
:There's no rivalry there.
879
:Right.
880
:There's like recently, right, there's
been some, some rivalry games.
881
:Like the, the Ravens were playing
the Browns, right, and it's a rivalry
882
:game, and it was like 41 to 17.
883
:That's not a rivalry.
884
:I'm sorry.
885
:Like when was the last time
the Browns beat the Ravens?
886
:I have no idea.
887
:Right.
888
:Not, or like remember the, the Dolphins
and the Patriots, or, no, not Dolphins.
889
:Actually.
890
:Dolphins beat the Patriots.
891
:But like the, the Bills
and the Patriots, right?
892
:The Patriots won that game for like.
893
:13 years in a row.
894
:That's not a rivalry.
895
:I'm not, no, we're not going there.
896
:Um,
897
:so again, if, if you're a professing
Christian, or you know, someone
898
:who's a professing Christian and they
struggle with these desires, are they
899
:struggling or are they embracing them?
900
:'cause here's what we remember we
talked about with this question.
901
:Are they embracing those desires and
saying, oh, I, I wanna keep these?
902
:Or are they saying I hate these?
903
:And I'm asking God to help me kill them.
904
:Those are two very
different things, right?
905
:Are you at war with those desires
or are you feeding those desires?
906
:Are you at peace with those?
907
:Just like as a regular Christian,
you have sinful desires, but
908
:what you do with them matters.
909
:Are you killing them or
are you giving into them?
910
:Same thing here, right?
911
:Am I stuck constantly, displeasing God
because I have a, a wrong orientation?
912
:Maybe someone who feels these things
is asking, well, are you Christian?
913
:Constantly displeasing God because
you still covet, or you're still
914
:anxious, or you still lust?
915
:This is where the gospel comes in, right?
916
:The gospel is also for gay people,
for lesbian people, for bisexual
917
:people, for transgender people, for
queer people, for asexual people, for
918
:pansexual people, for whatever, right?
919
:The gospel.
920
:For those people because just like any
other Christian, if, if having sinful
921
:desires made you displeasing to God,
would anyone ever be pleasing to God?
922
:No.
923
:Jesus righteousness makes
you pleasing to God.
924
:So if, if someone who struggles with these
desires says, I repent of these things,
925
:I'm not the way I'm supposed to be.
926
:I'm I, I don't feel the
things I'm supposed to feel.
927
:I'm messed up.
928
:I need, I, I, I'm guilty of my sin.
929
:I need a savior.
930
:I need Jesus to give me his righteousness
'cause I'm not good enough and I need
931
:Jesus to pay for my debt because I do
terrible things and I feel the wrong
932
:things and I think the wrong things.
933
:I need Jesus to pay for those sins.
934
:And they put their trust
in Jesus to do that.
935
:And they turn from they sin and they
say, that's not who I want to be anymore.
936
:I wanna live God's way.
937
:God's design is better.
938
:I trust him.
939
:He's my king.
940
:He's my shepherd.
941
:I wanna follow him.
942
:And they go to war with these
desires every day and say, I love
943
:Jesus more than I love my sin.
944
:That's what every Christian does.
945
:That's how every Christian lives.
946
:I hope that's, if you're a
professing Christian, I hope
947
:that's how you're living.
948
:So
949
:just because you have sinful desires
doesn't mean you can never be a Christian.
950
:But if you are just following your
sinful desires everywhere they take you,
951
:you're probably not a Christian, just
like we'd say for any sinful desire.
952
:Right?
953
:Same thing.
954
:So
955
:I hope this was helpful for
you asking these questions.
956
:Um, if you're talking with someone at
school about this or whatever, right?
957
:And you don't have to like go
looking for people to talk to.
958
:I'm not asking you to do that.
959
:Um, but if this comes up in a conversation
and someone asks you a question.
960
:And you're not sure how
to answer it, guess what?
961
:It's okay to say.
962
:I don't know.
963
:Let me get back to you.
964
:Just like with any question, if someone
asks you some random apologetics question
965
:you don't know about, I don't know.
966
:Let me get back to you.
967
:Let me, and talk to your leader about it.
968
:Talk to your parents about it.
969
:Talk to me about it.
970
:But this hopefully was a, it
was helpful for you to see,
971
:okay, here's what God says.
972
:Here's why this is wrong, and
here are maybe some things that
973
:can help you think through it.
974
:Okay.
975
:What I want you to see with
all of this is that our goal is
976
:to, to see people love Jesus.
977
:To see people trust him, right?
978
:Our goal is not to just tell
people that they're sinners.
979
:The reason we tell people that they're,
they're, they're sinners is because we
980
:love them and we want them to turn from
their sin and trust in Jesus because Jesus
981
:is amazing, and having a relationship
with Jesus is the, the best thing ever.
982
:So
983
:I hope that this wasn't just
you hearing, okay, this is bad.
984
:Don't worry about it.
985
:Right.
986
:That's not, I'm not in those
shoes, so forget about it.
987
:Right.
988
:I hope for you, this is okay.
989
:This is, this is why God's design is good.
990
:I'm not embarrassed about it.
991
:I'm, I'm not ashamed to, to talk about
it if it comes up, but I hope also you
992
:see that this is, this is really a,
just like any sin, it's a gospel issue.
993
:The, the gospel is.
994
:For all types of sinners,
995
:no matter what those sins are.
996
:And Jesus' righteousness is
necessary for every sinner.
997
:And Jesus' death pays for every sin.
998
:And so, um, our goal is to see people
trust Jesus and to turn from their sin
999
:and love him and live his way because
his way is the best way to live.
:
00:50:11,980 --> 00:50:12,310
So.
:
00:50:12,759 --> 00:50:14,470
We're gonna go talk about this
in small groups, so let's pray
:
00:50:15,220 --> 00:50:17,109
and we'll head over there.
:
00:50:20,529 --> 00:50:25,389
God, we are grateful that you love us
enough to tell us what's wrong with us.
:
00:50:25,930 --> 00:50:31,660
Um, we don't often appreciate that about
you, but we're grateful that you show
:
00:50:31,660 --> 00:50:34,149
us, um, what's good and what's not good.
:
00:50:34,720 --> 00:50:38,410
And so I pray that you help
us to love the right things.
:
00:50:39,025 --> 00:50:42,444
Help us to feel the right way
about who you are and what you say.
:
00:50:42,835 --> 00:50:49,134
I pray that we wouldn't be embarrassed
about, um, how you made people and
:
00:50:49,134 --> 00:50:53,275
how you made things to, how you
made your, your people to interact
:
00:50:53,275 --> 00:50:54,265
and to relate to each other.
:
00:50:54,325 --> 00:50:57,715
I pray that you help us to be
loving towards people who might,
:
00:50:58,105 --> 00:51:01,375
um, struggle with these desires or
might embrace this type of thinking.
:
00:51:01,465 --> 00:51:04,315
And I pray that we would
love them enough to.
:
00:51:06,535 --> 00:51:07,495
Tell them about you.
:
00:51:07,525 --> 00:51:11,905
And I pray for anyone here who
maybe does struggle with these types
:
00:51:11,905 --> 00:51:15,925
of desires and, and thinking that
I pray that you help them to see
:
00:51:15,925 --> 00:51:18,145
that you have a good plan for them.
:
00:51:18,355 --> 00:51:23,575
That you don't, that you love them
enough to offer them salvation.
:
00:51:23,725 --> 00:51:26,245
And you care so much about their
joy and their happiness even more
:
00:51:26,245 --> 00:51:31,765
than they do, and that they would
put their trust in you to, um, to
:
00:51:31,765 --> 00:51:32,870
have eternal life with you forever.
:
00:51:33,519 --> 00:51:34,450
We pray this in Jesus name.
:
00:51:34,689 --> 00:51:34,959
Amen.
